Every Cloud Has A Silver Lining
26/10/08 12:27 Filed in: Stories
This story starts out very bad, but has a very happy ending.
Yesterday, I had to clean up puke. Some little kid decided to throw up on A&C and I got the job of cleaning it because I could handle the sight and smell without throwing up myself. I don’t mind, I’ve cleaned up some kids piss before and it’s not like I have to get down and lick it. I better get used to that kinda stuff anyway, I’ll be no good as a nurse if I’m squeamish. The mother even offered to clean it up but I was like: No! Just get your child home before it pukes on anything else.
So I got to work mopping up what looked like tuna chunks and put up 3 yellow caution signs around the wet floor...but guess what. Only about half a dozen people out of all the customers in A&C over the period of half an hour actually took any notice of the signs.
Customer coming through, make way! A wet floor? Caution? Don’t be so ridiculous! I’m going to walk through here with the same cavalier attitude I always have when I go shopping.
So I stood there and warned people myself. I didn’t have to, our asses were covered with the safety signs so if anyone decided to take a dive, they wouldn’t have a law suit leg to stand on....literally. I just thought it would save a lot of trouble in the long run if I prevented an accident, rather than having to prove a customer wrong after one. We know they don’t like that.
These are a few highlights in the monotony of stupidity:
A 3 year old boy came racing down the aisle and I practically had to catch him to stop him. He then tries to walk back over the wet floor when his dad behind him tells him not to before proceeding to push a trolley over it himself.
You gotta be careful, son. We don’t want you falling and hurting yourself. You wait there. But it’s ok for Daddy to walk over it. Daddy’s older. He’s got further to fall and his bones are brittler.
And I was the one who got the dirty look for having the nerve to speak to his child in the first place! Great example of bad parenting right there. Nice work!
Another man comes up to me and asks “Could you get something down for me from the wall, or go and find someone who can?”.
Do you realise what you just said? How fucking short-sighted can you be? I still have to leave to go and get someone!
So I went to help him, and ended up dropping a plastic box on him from height, scoring 10 points. A hit on the head gets you 50 points.
A little while later, when the floor was nearly dry, I was approached by the little boy from earlier who wanted to know if he could walk that way yet. I said he’d have to walk around the right side of the signs, as that side was dry now. He interrogated me further before being called back by his father again, and when I looked up I saw a woman laughing in the aisle opposite. She comes up to me and says “That was hilarious. ‘Can I go this way? Can I go that way?’. It was so funny”.
At first I didn’t know she was referring to the little boy and I told her I was surprised by how many people ignore the caution signs. We had a bit of a laugh and she said “You could stand there all day and do psychological studies”. I thought: you do not know how close you are.
Later, I saw her again and she said to her mother “This is the girl that had to put up with that boy. You did very well. I don’t think I would have been as nice”.
I would like to thank this woman for being so understanding, and for giving me a laugh at a time when I needed it most. It was a Saturday, I’d just cleaned up sick, and my faith in humanity was reaching an all time low. Her, and her mother, were a joy to serve and they’ve delayed my trip to the psych ward for a little longer.
They deserve the Best Customers of All Time Award.
And they made it look so easy. How come ever other customer finds it so difficult?
Yesterday, I had to clean up puke. Some little kid decided to throw up on A&C and I got the job of cleaning it because I could handle the sight and smell without throwing up myself. I don’t mind, I’ve cleaned up some kids piss before and it’s not like I have to get down and lick it. I better get used to that kinda stuff anyway, I’ll be no good as a nurse if I’m squeamish. The mother even offered to clean it up but I was like: No! Just get your child home before it pukes on anything else.
So I got to work mopping up what looked like tuna chunks and put up 3 yellow caution signs around the wet floor...but guess what. Only about half a dozen people out of all the customers in A&C over the period of half an hour actually took any notice of the signs.
Customer coming through, make way! A wet floor? Caution? Don’t be so ridiculous! I’m going to walk through here with the same cavalier attitude I always have when I go shopping.
These are a few highlights in the monotony of stupidity:
A 3 year old boy came racing down the aisle and I practically had to catch him to stop him. He then tries to walk back over the wet floor when his dad behind him tells him not to before proceeding to push a trolley over it himself.
You gotta be careful, son. We don’t want you falling and hurting yourself. You wait there. But it’s ok for Daddy to walk over it. Daddy’s older. He’s got further to fall and his bones are brittler.
And I was the one who got the dirty look for having the nerve to speak to his child in the first place! Great example of bad parenting right there. Nice work!
Another man comes up to me and asks “Could you get something down for me from the wall, or go and find someone who can?”.
Do you realise what you just said? How fucking short-sighted can you be? I still have to leave to go and get someone!
So I went to help him, and ended up dropping a plastic box on him from height, scoring 10 points. A hit on the head gets you 50 points.
A little while later, when the floor was nearly dry, I was approached by the little boy from earlier who wanted to know if he could walk that way yet. I said he’d have to walk around the right side of the signs, as that side was dry now. He interrogated me further before being called back by his father again, and when I looked up I saw a woman laughing in the aisle opposite. She comes up to me and says “That was hilarious. ‘Can I go this way? Can I go that way?’. It was so funny”.
At first I didn’t know she was referring to the little boy and I told her I was surprised by how many people ignore the caution signs. We had a bit of a laugh and she said “You could stand there all day and do psychological studies”. I thought: you do not know how close you are.
Later, I saw her again and she said to her mother “This is the girl that had to put up with that boy. You did very well. I don’t think I would have been as nice”.
I would like to thank this woman for being so understanding, and for giving me a laugh at a time when I needed it most. It was a Saturday, I’d just cleaned up sick, and my faith in humanity was reaching an all time low. Her, and her mother, were a joy to serve and they’ve delayed my trip to the psych ward for a little longer.
They deserve the Best Customers of All Time Award.
And they made it look so easy. How come ever other customer finds it so difficult?
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Best Customer Award
21/06/08 20:57 Filed in: Stories
I spend so much time complaining and seething over stupid customers that I’d forgotten that there really are some lovely people out there, and if I reminded myself of that fact a bit more often, I’d be a bit less bitter.
There is one lady in particular who comes in about once a fortnight to top up her dress making supplies, and as soon as we get talking, we could be there for nearly an hour. She’s nearly 70 but young at heart and a really good laugh.
She even made me a necklace (which is really, really nice) when we were just getting to know each other because she liked my customer service. So that just shows I’m not one of those lazy, unhelpful, nonchalant sales assistants some of you might think I am.
So I’m going to award Lynda the Best Customer (of undetermined time period) Award!
I also had a customer today who was extremely nice, like too nice. I thought he was either gay or flirting but no, it just turns out he was a very, very, very, very happy person. He asked me for fabric scissors and sewing needles so I sent him upstairs to Textiles, but halfway up the escalator he shouted back down to me “They’re not for me by the way!”. I don’t know why, but I got the feeling I’d probably be seeing him again before he left the store and lo and behold, 15 minutes later, he’s back asking me where else he can buy sewing needles. I found it a really nice gesture that he came back to ask me, and he was happy no-matter what I said. Maybe I should find it creepy, but I don’t. It was like he could have got hit by a car and he’d still be smiling.
So I need more nice customers, and it doesn’t take much to be nice. Just an “excuse me”, “please” and a “thank you very much” with a smile, and all previous grievances are forgotten.
There is one lady in particular who comes in about once a fortnight to top up her dress making supplies, and as soon as we get talking, we could be there for nearly an hour. She’s nearly 70 but young at heart and a really good laugh.
She even made me a necklace (which is really, really nice) when we were just getting to know each other because she liked my customer service. So that just shows I’m not one of those lazy, unhelpful, nonchalant sales assistants some of you might think I am.
So I’m going to award Lynda the Best Customer (of undetermined time period) Award!
I also had a customer today who was extremely nice, like too nice. I thought he was either gay or flirting but no, it just turns out he was a very, very, very, very happy person. He asked me for fabric scissors and sewing needles so I sent him upstairs to Textiles, but halfway up the escalator he shouted back down to me “They’re not for me by the way!”. I don’t know why, but I got the feeling I’d probably be seeing him again before he left the store and lo and behold, 15 minutes later, he’s back asking me where else he can buy sewing needles. I found it a really nice gesture that he came back to ask me, and he was happy no-matter what I said. Maybe I should find it creepy, but I don’t. It was like he could have got hit by a car and he’d still be smiling.
So I need more nice customers, and it doesn’t take much to be nice. Just an “excuse me”, “please” and a “thank you very much” with a smile, and all previous grievances are forgotten.
