annoying
Consumer Politics
09/11/08 16:06 Filed in: Rants
When did the saying "The customer is always right" first come about? It's so engrained into consumer politics that for a party to disagree with it would be political, therefore economical, suicide.
It also seems that the bigger stores get, the louder customers feel they need to shout and stamp to be heard. Anyone else have a constant ringing in their ears?
For instance, before the friendly neighbourhood stores were driven out of business by the likes of Tesco, I can't imagine a customer going into their local corner shop effing and blinding to try and settle a dispute. The shopkeeper was quite possibly their neighbour so any disagreements could be resolved in person, and peacefully.
No need to ring their "customer helpline", or write to head office, or even Trading Standards; the guy behind the counter was probably "the man".
But now individual customers don't have the same hold over shops that they used to. Threatening to withdraw their custom doesn't have the same impact anymore. When a customer says to me "Well! I won't be shopping here anymore", I just think- yeah right. I'll just go and inform the manager that The Important Mrs. A will be shopping at Woolworths in future, but when you can't find that love seat anywhere else, you'll be back.
So customers resort to other tactics: threatening your job, threatening to ring Trading Standards, threatening to sue. I’m sure there’s always been people like this but it’s becoming more acceptable to be an asshole in public.
It’s ironic that as customers become more insecure, they deal with their problems in the least helpful way. Since when did being an A-hole gain you any empathy? I’m much more willing to help someone when they’re being civil rather than rude, and yet they still usually leave with what they wanted because it’s the only way to do business.
I know I sometimes struggle to keep it together myself. I recently got asked for ID even though I wasn’t even buying anything, but my boyfriend was buying alcohol. Since when have companies started asking not only the customer for ID, but every other person they’re with for ID too? I can sort of see where they’re coming from, but if they’re going to start doing that, where does it end? Will we need references soon?
True, the alcohol was for me and I’d taken my ID out my bag literally that morning so I was even more annoyed. It was my mistake and I didn’t take it out on the cashier. She was really nice too. Being rude to her would have gained nothing, but you shouldn’t have to work in retail to know that. It should be common sense.
I just wish Joe Public weren’t under the illusion that they are always right, and that companies didn’t indulge their stupid fantasy. There’s no give and take, just taking on both sides.
We take their money, they milk us for everything we’ve got.
It also seems that the bigger stores get, the louder customers feel they need to shout and stamp to be heard. Anyone else have a constant ringing in their ears?
For instance, before the friendly neighbourhood stores were driven out of business by the likes of Tesco, I can't imagine a customer going into their local corner shop effing and blinding to try and settle a dispute. The shopkeeper was quite possibly their neighbour so any disagreements could be resolved in person, and peacefully.
No need to ring their "customer helpline", or write to head office, or even Trading Standards; the guy behind the counter was probably "the man".
But now individual customers don't have the same hold over shops that they used to. Threatening to withdraw their custom doesn't have the same impact anymore. When a customer says to me "Well! I won't be shopping here anymore", I just think- yeah right. I'll just go and inform the manager that The Important Mrs. A will be shopping at Woolworths in future, but when you can't find that love seat anywhere else, you'll be back.
It’s ironic that as customers become more insecure, they deal with their problems in the least helpful way. Since when did being an A-hole gain you any empathy? I’m much more willing to help someone when they’re being civil rather than rude, and yet they still usually leave with what they wanted because it’s the only way to do business.
I know I sometimes struggle to keep it together myself. I recently got asked for ID even though I wasn’t even buying anything, but my boyfriend was buying alcohol. Since when have companies started asking not only the customer for ID, but every other person they’re with for ID too? I can sort of see where they’re coming from, but if they’re going to start doing that, where does it end? Will we need references soon?
True, the alcohol was for me and I’d taken my ID out my bag literally that morning so I was even more annoyed. It was my mistake and I didn’t take it out on the cashier. She was really nice too. Being rude to her would have gained nothing, but you shouldn’t have to work in retail to know that. It should be common sense.
I just wish Joe Public weren’t under the illusion that they are always right, and that companies didn’t indulge their stupid fantasy. There’s no give and take, just taking on both sides.
We take their money, they milk us for everything we’ve got.
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Superbitch-Winner!
20/10/08 14:01 Filed in: Stories
I’d probably say around 60% of customers are bad customers. By bad I mean: narky, ungrateful, rude, impatient and just generally unhappy about something. The majority of these customers I can deal with, they just go over my head and they’ll forget about me as soon as they’re out the door. The ones I really can’t stand are the ones that make it personal. It’s your fault somethings gone wrong and you’re a bad person for not living up to their standards and expectations.
Today I had a bitch of a customer. I wasn’t even serving her, but her friend had asked me how she could find out how much a dog bed was. That’s important-she asked “How can I...”, not “Can you...”. So I said she could use the price checker at the end of the aisle or take it to customer service. Had my hands not been full of rubbish I would have done it for her, but I was busy at the time and she hadn’t asked me to anyway. (I know she really meant “Can you...”. When do customers not mean “Can you do my shopping for me?”). But while I’m still standing in front of them, this bitch on steroids turns to her friend and says sarcastically “Oh, I’ll take it to customer service for you” and rolled her eyes.
What! What the hell was her problem?! All they needed to do was ask...properly.
I know I should have just left it, walked away, but I couldn’t let them leave thinking I’d done a bad job. I couldn’t let them walk out thinking I was the ignorant, good-for-nothing high school drop-out they had me labelled as just for working there. I had to redeem myself in what little way I could. I know it’s my job to help people, the customer always comes first, but when I literally can’t pick anything up, what can I do? You just can’t win.
While the Superbitch walked off, I literally dropped what I was doing and said to her friend that if she waited where she was, I’d go and scan it for her. I asked her to wait there because I’d already had one frustrating experience with two old ladies who went walk-about while I checked the price of a “cat house” for them earlier that day.
In the end she wasn’t even grateful anyway. Why did I fucking bother?
I will know if I see them again though. Superbitch was a proper winner-a winner of the fat and ugly game. And why was she fat? Because she refuses to walk anywhere unnecessarily, like the few meters to the price checker.
WARNING: throwing your toys out your pram like a big baby might occasionally get you your own way, but it also makes you look like a tit, a grade A GG tit.
Today I had a bitch of a customer. I wasn’t even serving her, but her friend had asked me how she could find out how much a dog bed was. That’s important-she asked “How can I...”, not “Can you...”. So I said she could use the price checker at the end of the aisle or take it to customer service. Had my hands not been full of rubbish I would have done it for her, but I was busy at the time and she hadn’t asked me to anyway. (I know she really meant “Can you...”. When do customers not mean “Can you do my shopping for me?”). But while I’m still standing in front of them, this bitch on steroids turns to her friend and says sarcastically “Oh, I’ll take it to customer service for you” and rolled her eyes.
What! What the hell was her problem?! All they needed to do was ask...properly.
While the Superbitch walked off, I literally dropped what I was doing and said to her friend that if she waited where she was, I’d go and scan it for her. I asked her to wait there because I’d already had one frustrating experience with two old ladies who went walk-about while I checked the price of a “cat house” for them earlier that day.
In the end she wasn’t even grateful anyway. Why did I fucking bother?
I will know if I see them again though. Superbitch was a proper winner-a winner of the fat and ugly game. And why was she fat? Because she refuses to walk anywhere unnecessarily, like the few meters to the price checker.
WARNING: throwing your toys out your pram like a big baby might occasionally get you your own way, but it also makes you look like a tit, a grade A GG tit.
Diagnosis: Psychosis
13/10/08 18:29 Filed in: Rants
I don’t know why it is that some people simply forget how to read when they go shopping, but I no longer feel it only applies to stores. More and more I’ve noticed that people become illiterate as soon as they leave the house; or maybe I’ve been mislead in thinking people are generally better educated these days and their illiteracy actually has nothing to do with fresh air or price tags.
I see this phenomenon almost daily, on my way to work.
One of the buses I can get to work doubles back on itself for part of it’s route, so no matter which way you’re going, buses traveling to either destination stop at the same stops, on the same side of the road, sometimes at the same time down the same stretch of road before splitting up and going their own separate ways again. Good job they have their destination displayed on the front otherwise you wouldn’t know which one was which.
You’d think.
So often people try and get on the wrong bus and it’s only because they have to state where they’re getting off that they get rumbled. The drivers must despair. I despair!
Yesterday a man got on with a free pass. He didn’t have to say where he was going so the driver couldn’t save him the trouble of jumping out his seat as soon as we got round the corner and getting off at the next stop because he’s got on the wrong bus.
I would have thought that people getting on on that stretch of road would be a little more observant, seeing as there’s a 50/50 chance the bus is going the opposite way to where they’re going.
However, looking at the front of the bus doesn’t necessarily mean they’ve paid any attention. I saw one woman who was absolutely adamant she’d got on the right bus even though all signs told her otherwise.
As further testament to peoples blind stupidity, we’ve recently moved a few of our departments round and despite having to walk past shelf upon shelf of pictures frames and dodge displays of mirrors on their way in, customers still get upstairs and ask where Gallery went. There’s even notices on the front door stating there’s been a refit and the new location of certain departments.
Apart from not seeing the wood for the trees, is it just laziness or do people seriously think that all these signs and notices don’t apply to them? In their universe the bus is going where they want and Gallery is still found upstairs because they’re the customer (or passenger) and they are always right, even when they’re wrong.
If only it was as easy as Adam Savage makes it sound: “I reject your reality and substitute my own”.
I see this phenomenon almost daily, on my way to work.
One of the buses I can get to work doubles back on itself for part of it’s route, so no matter which way you’re going, buses traveling to either destination stop at the same stops, on the same side of the road, sometimes at the same time down the same stretch of road before splitting up and going their own separate ways again. Good job they have their destination displayed on the front otherwise you wouldn’t know which one was which.
You’d think.
So often people try and get on the wrong bus and it’s only because they have to state where they’re getting off that they get rumbled. The drivers must despair. I despair!
Yesterday a man got on with a free pass. He didn’t have to say where he was going so the driver couldn’t save him the trouble of jumping out his seat as soon as we got round the corner and getting off at the next stop because he’s got on the wrong bus.
I would have thought that people getting on on that stretch of road would be a little more observant, seeing as there’s a 50/50 chance the bus is going the opposite way to where they’re going.
However, looking at the front of the bus doesn’t necessarily mean they’ve paid any attention. I saw one woman who was absolutely adamant she’d got on the right bus even though all signs told her otherwise.
As further testament to peoples blind stupidity, we’ve recently moved a few of our departments round and despite having to walk past shelf upon shelf of pictures frames and dodge displays of mirrors on their way in, customers still get upstairs and ask where Gallery went. There’s even notices on the front door stating there’s been a refit and the new location of certain departments.
Apart from not seeing the wood for the trees, is it just laziness or do people seriously think that all these signs and notices don’t apply to them? In their universe the bus is going where they want and Gallery is still found upstairs because they’re the customer (or passenger) and they are always right, even when they’re wrong.
If only it was as easy as Adam Savage makes it sound: “I reject your reality and substitute my own”.
Even Cats Know Better
27/09/08 20:26 Filed in: Rants
Yesterday, something struck me at work. It wasn't a canvas this time, just a thought I'd had and forgotten several times before.
Why do customers think it's okay to destroy stock and demand unreasonable compensation from stores because they think "these big corporate companies" can afford it?
I know they're trying to hurt the fat cats where it hurts-their wallet, but if the company I work for starts making a loss, it's going to start closing stores, and who's that going to affect? Us.
The big CEOs at the top will always try to make sure they're left with as much money in their pockets as possible, while the people at the bottom are left with no job, and before long, no money.
Why don't customers realise this?! By destroying stock they're only making more work and more losses for our store. Their argument would be "Well, that's what you get paid for", but how is that an excuse?
Yes, we have to tidy up after piggy customers all day so.....what? That's a reason to rip things apart, crumple things up and tread on them? You think you're doing us a favour by creating more work and keeping us in a job?
The only thing you're really doing is jeopardising my livelihood and making yourself look like a dick.
(Only stupider!)
These thoughts were triggered yesterday when I went to tidy the cross-stitch/knitting area and found every single box of the beginner knitting sets had been ripped open. They're sealed in several places with tape and when they can't pick the tape off, the customers resort to ripping around them. What I don't get is why every single one had been opened. It's as if customers come along, see that someone's touched the box already and have to open another one as if the first ones unclean.
I also found an A2 piece of pastel paper that had been rolled up and folded, and then whoever the culprit was had decided it wasn't what they were looking for after all and left it in an unsellable mess on top of the paper stand.
I know stuff gets broken, accidents happen, but deliberately damaging something you have no intention of buying, just because you think you have the right as a customer, is nothing short of vandalism. If you want to mess with that Fimo, you fucking buy it first. You’re not a retard, this isn’t play group, by the time you were seven you should have learnt breaking stuff that wasn’t yours was wrong.
And you’re not going to get a refund on something because you accidentally sat on it at home. You broke! We don’t pay!
If we could read customers minds, maybe this is what we'd see-"You work in shop. You stupid. You deserve bad. I broke something. I want money back. Customer always right. Big company listen to me. I warn them. I no shop here no more unless you give me money".....something like that.
So don’t be a dick, just ask or leave stuff the fuck alone, okay?!
Why do customers think it's okay to destroy stock and demand unreasonable compensation from stores because they think "these big corporate companies" can afford it?
I know they're trying to hurt the fat cats where it hurts-their wallet, but if the company I work for starts making a loss, it's going to start closing stores, and who's that going to affect? Us.
The big CEOs at the top will always try to make sure they're left with as much money in their pockets as possible, while the people at the bottom are left with no job, and before long, no money.
Why don't customers realise this?! By destroying stock they're only making more work and more losses for our store. Their argument would be "Well, that's what you get paid for", but how is that an excuse?
Yes, we have to tidy up after piggy customers all day so.....what? That's a reason to rip things apart, crumple things up and tread on them? You think you're doing us a favour by creating more work and keeping us in a job?
The only thing you're really doing is jeopardising my livelihood and making yourself look like a dick.
(Only stupider!)These thoughts were triggered yesterday when I went to tidy the cross-stitch/knitting area and found every single box of the beginner knitting sets had been ripped open. They're sealed in several places with tape and when they can't pick the tape off, the customers resort to ripping around them. What I don't get is why every single one had been opened. It's as if customers come along, see that someone's touched the box already and have to open another one as if the first ones unclean.
I also found an A2 piece of pastel paper that had been rolled up and folded, and then whoever the culprit was had decided it wasn't what they were looking for after all and left it in an unsellable mess on top of the paper stand.
I know stuff gets broken, accidents happen, but deliberately damaging something you have no intention of buying, just because you think you have the right as a customer, is nothing short of vandalism. If you want to mess with that Fimo, you fucking buy it first. You’re not a retard, this isn’t play group, by the time you were seven you should have learnt breaking stuff that wasn’t yours was wrong.
And you’re not going to get a refund on something because you accidentally sat on it at home. You broke! We don’t pay!
If we could read customers minds, maybe this is what we'd see-"You work in shop. You stupid. You deserve bad. I broke something. I want money back. Customer always right. Big company listen to me. I warn them. I no shop here no more unless you give me money".....something like that.
So don’t be a dick, just ask or leave stuff the fuck alone, okay?!
The Time Wasters
23/09/08 18:17 Filed in: Rants
Some of the problems customers complain about are so ridiculous, I think they just invent them because they’re bored and want to talk to someone. Sometimes it’s not even a problem, they just ask to have a look at something and get me to un-box it, then say they’ll come back for it later but never show.
Maybe they’re just wasting time waiting for a bus; maybe they’re lonely.
One old woman came in on Sunday wanting to return a pack of scrapbook paper, claiming that one of the designs didn’t look how it should. Truthfully, she didn’t know how it was supposed to look but it wasn’t to her liking and she was damn well going to tell someone about it.
Yes, the paper did look like it had water damage (looked, not felt) but a lot of scrapbook papers are made to look distressed or aged, and the fact that every single sheet of that variety had exactly the same marks on it obviously didn’t tell her something.
So, I took her over to where these packs were on the shelf and showed her that all the paper looked like that. Funnily enough, that particular design was the one you can see through the back of the packaging. If you’ve never bought scrapbook paper, a pack will contain, say, 6 different designs with 5 sheets of each and one design will usually face outwards at the back, while a sheet at the front shows small examples of each. Well, as far as the brands we sell are concerned, they do, and I don’t think it’s a coincidence the manufacturers chose that particular design to face out. Obviously, this stupid woman hadn’t even bothered to turn the pack over before she bought it.
But as if that wasn’t enough, even after I’d shown her every pack and proved there was nothing wrong with her paper, she complained that the marks on her paper were much darker than in the other packs. I offered to exchange it for her but I’d need a receipt, which she’d conveniently thrown away. Even if she’d had a case, there’s nothing I can do without a receipt, as is the policy in most other shops.
Everyone knows that, right?
Well, not her. Not giving her a refund or exchange because she didn’t have a receipt was reason for her to say she would never be shopping here again. Yeah, like thats a bad thing.
Oh, and just one more thing....not only was she unhappy with the contents of her paper pack, but she was also extremely annoyed that the outside was covered in glitter, which inevitably ended up on her carpet. She’d picked the pack up off the display table during a card-making demo, where the demonstrator was using glitter and sprinkles and other pretty sparkly things, so I don’t really know what she expected but she insisted on telling me repeatedly anyway.
So to sum everything up, just how many stupid things did this dumb bitch do?
1) Not realising every sheet in the pack was the same
2) Not even looking at the pack properly before she bought it
3) Throwing away her receipt
4) Cutting off her nose to spite her face
5) Moaning about free glitter
God, it felt more than 5.
6) Being a miserable, pedantic bitch with nothing better to do than go in to shops and waste peoples time over a bit of fucking paper.
Fuck off you old bag!
Maybe they’re just wasting time waiting for a bus; maybe they’re lonely.
One old woman came in on Sunday wanting to return a pack of scrapbook paper, claiming that one of the designs didn’t look how it should. Truthfully, she didn’t know how it was supposed to look but it wasn’t to her liking and she was damn well going to tell someone about it.
Yes, the paper did look like it had water damage (looked, not felt) but a lot of scrapbook papers are made to look distressed or aged, and the fact that every single sheet of that variety had exactly the same marks on it obviously didn’t tell her something.
So, I took her over to where these packs were on the shelf and showed her that all the paper looked like that. Funnily enough, that particular design was the one you can see through the back of the packaging. If you’ve never bought scrapbook paper, a pack will contain, say, 6 different designs with 5 sheets of each and one design will usually face outwards at the back, while a sheet at the front shows small examples of each. Well, as far as the brands we sell are concerned, they do, and I don’t think it’s a coincidence the manufacturers chose that particular design to face out. Obviously, this stupid woman hadn’t even bothered to turn the pack over before she bought it.
But as if that wasn’t enough, even after I’d shown her every pack and proved there was nothing wrong with her paper, she complained that the marks on her paper were much darker than in the other packs. I offered to exchange it for her but I’d need a receipt, which she’d conveniently thrown away. Even if she’d had a case, there’s nothing I can do without a receipt, as is the policy in most other shops.
Everyone knows that, right?
Well, not her. Not giving her a refund or exchange because she didn’t have a receipt was reason for her to say she would never be shopping here again. Yeah, like thats a bad thing.
Oh, and just one more thing....not only was she unhappy with the contents of her paper pack, but she was also extremely annoyed that the outside was covered in glitter, which inevitably ended up on her carpet. She’d picked the pack up off the display table during a card-making demo, where the demonstrator was using glitter and sprinkles and other pretty sparkly things, so I don’t really know what she expected but she insisted on telling me repeatedly anyway.
So to sum everything up, just how many stupid things did this dumb bitch do?
1) Not realising every sheet in the pack was the same
2) Not even looking at the pack properly before she bought it
3) Throwing away her receipt
4) Cutting off her nose to spite her face
5) Moaning about free glitter
God, it felt more than 5.
6) Being a miserable, pedantic bitch with nothing better to do than go in to shops and waste peoples time over a bit of fucking paper.
Fuck off you old bag!
Sky is the Limit
18/09/08 14:36 Filed in: Rants
After months of putting it off, my boyfriend finally signed up to Sky (the UK’s largest satellite TV provider).
You know how much I like bitching about dumb customers, but yet again I found myself on the receiving end of, for lack of a better word, the shittest customer service I’ve had to deal with since I left AOL, and I just have to say something about it. I was always having to ring AOL with some problem and they would usually, eventually solve it. As much as people hate call centers, I didn’t think it could get much worse than that.
I also had to ring FedEx once, when they lost over £500 worth of (imported) iPhones, but that was quite funny.
We had been tracking the package on the internet and watched it go all round the country before sitting for 2 days in Glasgow. I gave them a ring, said I wanted to check the delivery status when the girl I was speaking to said “Ah...yes...it’s in Glasgow”. I said “Yes. I know it’s in Glasgow. That’s why I’m ringing you. It’s been there since Tuesday”. I know not a lot of people like FedEx but they were very nice over the phone. They got a manager to speak to me and he even rang back to check our package had been delivered. A++!
But I’ve just been on the phone to Sky because the “engineer”, who came to install it this morning, has drilled a hole so big in the wall, we can see the side of next doors house through it, and that’s with the wire going through. Not only that, we’d also ordered multi-room but he only arrived with one box, so no multi-room until Monday when another engineer has to come and sort out this mess.
Those aren’t the only things wrong though. I could go on...no phone call beforehand (they’re supposed to let you know when they’re coming), he hasn’t connected the Sky box to the phone line (which is part of the contract), and he left a pile of boxes in the road outside the house.
Was Sky’s customer support line any help though? No! It’s just the luck of the draw who you get through to, and I did eventually get through to someone who apologised, but the rest seemed a pretty incompetent bunch. There’s also no complaints department over the phone so we have to right a letter or email, and it could take weeks to get a reply, and we already had to wait over 3 weeks to get it installed in the first place.
Grrr! It’s like everything that could have gone wrong, went wrong, and we are seriously regretting signing up in the first place. So, if you’re thinking of getting Sky, be warned! You could end up being a very unhappy customer.
A Case of the Back Seat Customer
09/09/08 15:41 Filed in: Rants
Ever had a case where a couple comes in and one half asks you for help while the other half hangs around and contradicts your suggestions?
It happened to me last week when a woman asked me for help on finding “B pencils”. That’s all I had to go on-B pencils. So I picked out a set of 12 for her with pencils from 9B to HB, along with F and H. What more could you need, but she still wasn’t sure. Maybe she was looking for bee pencils but we don’t sell pencils with bees on.
Cue husband, who comes in and points to nearly every single other pack of pencils we sell saying stuff like “What about these?” or “This set has B pencils” and “You don’t need all those ones”, which I had to counter with “Yes, that set has B pencils in but also a lot of H pencils in, which you don’t need” or “Those are charcoal”.
This went on for a few minutes and in the end they chose the smallest, cheapest pack of pencils we sell.
Maybe it’s just me, because I’m young and blonde some customers like to lord over me and flex their egos because they don’t get the chance to do it anywhere else. In some cases I think it boils down to sexism, subconscious or not, because it’s usually the men that like to do the contradicting. Men don’t like to ask for help but don’t mind dishing it out where it’s not needed because they think I don’t have the capacity to tell B pencils from Parker pens. Sorry guys.
Anyway, it doesn’t happen to me that much. I just find it really annoying when I’m trying to serve someone, say I’m helping them with fabric paints, and their friend keeps interrupting, or worse, telling me what I already know. I’ll be showing them the Dylon paints, which are next to the Anita’s acrylic paints, and Friend will say “Here! These say you can use them on fabrics too!” and I just wish I could say “I know! I was getting to those! Butt out! You interfering, know-it-all waste of space!”.
It happened to me last week when a woman asked me for help on finding “B pencils”. That’s all I had to go on-B pencils. So I picked out a set of 12 for her with pencils from 9B to HB, along with F and H. What more could you need, but she still wasn’t sure. Maybe she was looking for bee pencils but we don’t sell pencils with bees on.
Cue husband, who comes in and points to nearly every single other pack of pencils we sell saying stuff like “What about these?” or “This set has B pencils” and “You don’t need all those ones”, which I had to counter with “Yes, that set has B pencils in but also a lot of H pencils in, which you don’t need” or “Those are charcoal”.
This went on for a few minutes and in the end they chose the smallest, cheapest pack of pencils we sell.
Maybe it’s just me, because I’m young and blonde some customers like to lord over me and flex their egos because they don’t get the chance to do it anywhere else. In some cases I think it boils down to sexism, subconscious or not, because it’s usually the men that like to do the contradicting. Men don’t like to ask for help but don’t mind dishing it out where it’s not needed because they think I don’t have the capacity to tell B pencils from Parker pens. Sorry guys.
Anyway, it doesn’t happen to me that much. I just find it really annoying when I’m trying to serve someone, say I’m helping them with fabric paints, and their friend keeps interrupting, or worse, telling me what I already know. I’ll be showing them the Dylon paints, which are next to the Anita’s acrylic paints, and Friend will say “Here! These say you can use them on fabrics too!” and I just wish I could say “I know! I was getting to those! Butt out! You interfering, know-it-all waste of space!”.
Consumer Rage Part 2
01/09/08 15:28 Filed in: Rants
I started this blog so that I could rant and rave about customers to my hearts content, but more and more I’m finding myself equally frustrated with other retail workers.
I’ve touched on this before in “Consumer Rage” a while back.
Street sellers especially annoy me. I was stopped a few weeks ago by a woman who was offering £350 worth of hair treatments for £55. I turned it down but she would not take no for an answer. Pay by cheque, she said, put it on your credit card, borrow money from your parents, and then she expected me to write down my card details in the street, not to mention I didn’t have a clue who she was. When I still refused she started calling me crazy. I wish my mouth wouldn’t stop working when I get surprised. She got away unscathed. Then last week I noticed a group of girls trying to sell the same offer and I’m really glad they didn’t stop me. I know I’m supposed to love my fellow retail slave but I think I would have snapped. I guess that’s what’s meant by “going postal”.
I’ve also heard some very dodgy things about Phones 4 U. They’ve never been one to be trusted but they’ve been offering cash in hand to customers to get them to sign up to contracts. Someone was offered £50 out of the salespersons own pocket to get him to sign a contract on the spot (he declined), and a guy from work was persuaded to take out a whole new contract, despite already being on one and only going into the shop to try and get his old phone repaired, with £200 in cash to go and pay off his old contract with. Sound a bit weird to you? Reading on the internet it sounds like a lot of people have had problems with them. Not only does their customer service suck but they downright lie to get you to sign up. That must be what commission does to you. Why do companies still pay commission?
This really gets to me because when I go shopping I want to be treated the same as how I treat my customers (which is good, by the way) and I hate to see people getting paid the same as me and getting away with a lot more shit than I do. It’s also because salespeople and companies like the aforementioned are the reason why customers are so distrustful of the rest of us. Even if I just try and recommend a product that’s better suited to the customer than what they’re looking for, some will immediately dismiss it because they think I’m trying to get more money out of them. They’re even suspicious of why we don’t offer a full parking refund over 60p. One lady said to me “It’s very interesting that Asda refund the whole amount whereas you only refund up to 60p. Very interesting.” Jesus Christ woman! Asda is owned by one of the biggest, multinational companies in the world, that’s how they can afford to offer you a full refund. What is interesting is that you expect to come into town and not have to pay for your own parking!
Ahh...I’m back to customer hating again.
I’ve touched on this before in “Consumer Rage” a while back.
Street sellers especially annoy me. I was stopped a few weeks ago by a woman who was offering £350 worth of hair treatments for £55. I turned it down but she would not take no for an answer. Pay by cheque, she said, put it on your credit card, borrow money from your parents, and then she expected me to write down my card details in the street, not to mention I didn’t have a clue who she was. When I still refused she started calling me crazy. I wish my mouth wouldn’t stop working when I get surprised. She got away unscathed. Then last week I noticed a group of girls trying to sell the same offer and I’m really glad they didn’t stop me. I know I’m supposed to love my fellow retail slave but I think I would have snapped. I guess that’s what’s meant by “going postal”.
I’ve also heard some very dodgy things about Phones 4 U. They’ve never been one to be trusted but they’ve been offering cash in hand to customers to get them to sign up to contracts. Someone was offered £50 out of the salespersons own pocket to get him to sign a contract on the spot (he declined), and a guy from work was persuaded to take out a whole new contract, despite already being on one and only going into the shop to try and get his old phone repaired, with £200 in cash to go and pay off his old contract with. Sound a bit weird to you? Reading on the internet it sounds like a lot of people have had problems with them. Not only does their customer service suck but they downright lie to get you to sign up. That must be what commission does to you. Why do companies still pay commission?
This really gets to me because when I go shopping I want to be treated the same as how I treat my customers (which is good, by the way) and I hate to see people getting paid the same as me and getting away with a lot more shit than I do. It’s also because salespeople and companies like the aforementioned are the reason why customers are so distrustful of the rest of us. Even if I just try and recommend a product that’s better suited to the customer than what they’re looking for, some will immediately dismiss it because they think I’m trying to get more money out of them. They’re even suspicious of why we don’t offer a full parking refund over 60p. One lady said to me “It’s very interesting that Asda refund the whole amount whereas you only refund up to 60p. Very interesting.” Jesus Christ woman! Asda is owned by one of the biggest, multinational companies in the world, that’s how they can afford to offer you a full refund. What is interesting is that you expect to come into town and not have to pay for your own parking!
Ahh...I’m back to customer hating again.
RT is STILL a Cry Baby Customer
27/08/08 23:40 Filed in: Micro
I got a reply from the book seller. They’re not allowed to have customers on the warehouse site because their insurance doesn’t cover it, and I finally got a phone number from them. Not that it’s much use because I’m not going to be ringing them.
I understand about their insurance and everything but I’m still pissed. It’s literally just round the corner from my house. And like Nick said in the comments-he took his business elsewhere because they make it so difficult to get in contact with them. Lost business, lost profit. There’s a lot of conflicting information about them on google.
I’ll still end up buying from them because there’s not much chance of it getting lost in the 800m it has to travel to my house, but knowing Royal Mail it will still take 3 weeks.
Hmmm....very, very annoying.
I understand about their insurance and everything but I’m still pissed. It’s literally just round the corner from my house. And like Nick said in the comments-he took his business elsewhere because they make it so difficult to get in contact with them. Lost business, lost profit. There’s a lot of conflicting information about them on google.
I’ll still end up buying from them because there’s not much chance of it getting lost in the 800m it has to travel to my house, but knowing Royal Mail it will still take 3 weeks.
Hmmm....very, very annoying.
Treat customers like drugs - just say NO!
09/08/08 11:51 Filed in: Stories
Last night a guy came in under strict orders from his wife to buy a particular coffee table. While the manager was looking in the back to see if we had any in stock, he asked me if he could take the one on display. I told him no, because we only sell the display one once we know we’re not getting any more in stock and that even if we didn’t have any in the back at the moment we could easily order one in for him. But then he says the only reason he wants the display one is so that he doesn’t have to build it himself when he gets home.
Lazy. Fuck.
The manager also made the mistake of telling him that we take 20% off the display models, this being the same manager who gave in to that stupid woman with the dog bed, so I know damn well why he really wants the one on display.
And in the end he got it! *anger*
That manager just gives into everyone. People like him are the reason why customers think they can get away with anything.
Now someone will have to rebuild another coffee table, and we’ll lose another 20% off it.
Nice going!
Lazy. Fuck.
The manager also made the mistake of telling him that we take 20% off the display models, this being the same manager who gave in to that stupid woman with the dog bed, so I know damn well why he really wants the one on display.
And in the end he got it! *anger*
That manager just gives into everyone. People like him are the reason why customers think they can get away with anything.
Now someone will have to rebuild another coffee table, and we’ll lose another 20% off it.
Nice going!
Pet hate + phone phobia ≠ success
07/08/08 13:41 Filed in: Stories
Sunday 27th July
Something that I really hate doing in work is using the phone. Fortunately, I don’t have to do it that often, but occasionally I’ll get called over to customer service to answer a customers query over the phone and I really, really hate it.
There was also the time when I asked for the store manager to be called to customer service over the tannoy but he rang down on the phone instead. Whoever was on CS just handed me the phone with no explanation and I didn’t expect it to be the manager so I just said hello, and all the manager said was hello, so we went back and forth like that for a while. I really didn’t recognise his voice, which is fucking stupid because he’s Canadian, and eventually he says “Yeah! Whats up?!”, and I’m like..shit! Lol. Rarely have I ever been more embarrassed. I blame my phobia of the work phone for temporarily losing my wits and making a fool of myself. I’d also like to blame the person on CS for not telling me who was on the other end, and because I don’t like him.
But what I hate most is when customers ask me to ring another store to see if they have a certain item in stock. It’s so lazy! I have to stand there while they glare at me because I’m on hold, like because I work there everything should happen faster and it’s my fault when it doesn’t.
This happened quite recently when a couple came in looking for these certain stickers and asked me to ring such and such a store. I said sure, but I could also give them the number so they could do it themselves in their own time, and had they tried the website. This was 2pm on a Sunday and I had just been about to go for my (late) lunch, but they said no, they wanted me to ring the store.
While I was on hold the guy asked me to ask them for directions to the store for him, so I asked if they had the internet, which they did, so I said I’d give them the store’s postcode and they could look it up themselves on google maps when they got home. They didn’t argue with that.
It took another 15 minutes to finally find out that the other store didn’t have any stickers either. The guy then asked for all the details about the store and item that I’d jotted down just as a quick reference, including the SKU number, like he had a clue what that was. I gave it to him anyway, explaining that only the first 4 numbers were relevant because the last 2 referred to the same stickers but in a different colour. I knew he wasn’t listening.
It really pissed me off. I’d asked him if he was able to pick the stickers up that day if they had any, and he said no, so I don’t understand what the rush was. They could have just rung the store when they got home, and seeing as our stores are open till 8pm they could have rung after 6 when calls are cheaper, if not free. Why do customers expect more if they get a staff member to do stuff for them? It’s actually likely to make things worse, because as soon as the other store heard I wasn’t the customer there was no pressure on them to please.
We’re retail slaves, not miracle workers.
Something that I really hate doing in work is using the phone. Fortunately, I don’t have to do it that often, but occasionally I’ll get called over to customer service to answer a customers query over the phone and I really, really hate it.
There was also the time when I asked for the store manager to be called to customer service over the tannoy but he rang down on the phone instead. Whoever was on CS just handed me the phone with no explanation and I didn’t expect it to be the manager so I just said hello, and all the manager said was hello, so we went back and forth like that for a while. I really didn’t recognise his voice, which is fucking stupid because he’s Canadian, and eventually he says “Yeah! Whats up?!”, and I’m like..shit! Lol. Rarely have I ever been more embarrassed. I blame my phobia of the work phone for temporarily losing my wits and making a fool of myself. I’d also like to blame the person on CS for not telling me who was on the other end, and because I don’t like him.
But what I hate most is when customers ask me to ring another store to see if they have a certain item in stock. It’s so lazy! I have to stand there while they glare at me because I’m on hold, like because I work there everything should happen faster and it’s my fault when it doesn’t.
This happened quite recently when a couple came in looking for these certain stickers and asked me to ring such and such a store. I said sure, but I could also give them the number so they could do it themselves in their own time, and had they tried the website. This was 2pm on a Sunday and I had just been about to go for my (late) lunch, but they said no, they wanted me to ring the store.
While I was on hold the guy asked me to ask them for directions to the store for him, so I asked if they had the internet, which they did, so I said I’d give them the store’s postcode and they could look it up themselves on google maps when they got home. They didn’t argue with that.
It took another 15 minutes to finally find out that the other store didn’t have any stickers either. The guy then asked for all the details about the store and item that I’d jotted down just as a quick reference, including the SKU number, like he had a clue what that was. I gave it to him anyway, explaining that only the first 4 numbers were relevant because the last 2 referred to the same stickers but in a different colour. I knew he wasn’t listening.
It really pissed me off. I’d asked him if he was able to pick the stickers up that day if they had any, and he said no, so I don’t understand what the rush was. They could have just rung the store when they got home, and seeing as our stores are open till 8pm they could have rung after 6 when calls are cheaper, if not free. Why do customers expect more if they get a staff member to do stuff for them? It’s actually likely to make things worse, because as soon as the other store heard I wasn’t the customer there was no pressure on them to please.
We’re retail slaves, not miracle workers.
Retail Slave Malfunctions
07/08/08 12:08 Filed in: Stories
Helloooo! I’m a day late, sorry, but I have got some really good stories. I’ll post them in the order that they happened rather than saving the best till last, and I think this one is probably the best.
Friday 25th July
I think today was the day for customers threatening us with trading standards.
First off, one woman complained that a dog bed was wrongly priced. She’d assumed the size that was advertised was the largest one, then kicked off when she got to the till and found that it was more expensive. It clearly said on the price sign that the 15L dog bed was £14.99, or something like that, and it says on the tag attached to each dog bed the size of the bed, she just hadn’t bothered to check. Lazy, stupid and....wrong! Infuriatingly, the manager let her have it for the lower price.
But later on that day a guy asked me about the prices of the canvases. At first I was a bit confused too, but it’s easy enough to understand once you read the prices carefully.
Customer: “Excuse me, am I right in thinking this canvas is £2.99?”
(I go to check the price on the till)
Me: “No, that’s £7.99.”
Customer: “Well it says here it’s £2.99.”
Me: “That’s the deep edge canvases.”
(That’s where I got a bit confused. 30x24 staple back canvas - £7.99, 30x24 deep edge canvas - £2.99. Then I read the measurements, the staple backs were priced in inches, and the deep edge in cm.)
Customer: “But look! It says here ’30x24 - £2.99’.”
Me: “Yes, but that’s in cm so it’s for a much smaller canvas. The canvas you want is 30x24 inches.”
Customer: “Well, can I have it for £2.99?”
Me: “No, because even if the sizes had been the same, you were still looking at the prices for the wrong type of canvas.”
(I stand there while he thinks about this.)
Me: “Is everything alright now?”
Customer: “Well no, because I’m a bit disappointed this canvas isn’t £2.99. I’m not trying to be funny or anything, I work in a shop too, y’know. Can you go and speak to your manager and see what he can do?”
What a dickhead! What makes it so much worse is that he also works in a shop. And why mention it? Any empathy I might have had evaporated 10 minutes ago. He wants money off because he was “diappointed” with the price? Big fucking deal.
I go and speak to the manager, wary that he’d given in to a similar customer earlier that day, but I didn’t care what he’d said, that guy was not getting money off that canvas. Luckily the manager thought along exactly the same lines as I did - “That guys just taking the piss!”. So I go down and give this retail slave gone bad the news, which he takes very badly....
Customer: “Well, I want it in writing, please. I want a copy of these prices and I’m going to trading standards on Monday! And can you tell the manager that as well.”
I go and scan both the deep edge and staple back prices and patronise him by asking if he’d like me to highlight the ones in question (“No! I know which ones there are, thankyou!”). I don’t know what he was playing at. Obviously he was desperately trying to get money off this canvas, knowing full well he was in the wrong, and thought he knew all the tricks in the book because he worked in a shop. Must have slipped his mind that I do too. *Sigh*, what a dumbass! I also think he was trying to get a rise out of me by being so difficult so that he could use poor customer service against me as well because he was a bit put out that I was being so nice about everything.
He bought the canvas anyway at £7.99, and we never heard anything from trading standards.
Me: 10092 - Dumbass customers: 0
Friday 25th July
I think today was the day for customers threatening us with trading standards.
First off, one woman complained that a dog bed was wrongly priced. She’d assumed the size that was advertised was the largest one, then kicked off when she got to the till and found that it was more expensive. It clearly said on the price sign that the 15L dog bed was £14.99, or something like that, and it says on the tag attached to each dog bed the size of the bed, she just hadn’t bothered to check. Lazy, stupid and....wrong! Infuriatingly, the manager let her have it for the lower price.
But later on that day a guy asked me about the prices of the canvases. At first I was a bit confused too, but it’s easy enough to understand once you read the prices carefully.
Customer: “Excuse me, am I right in thinking this canvas is £2.99?”
(I go to check the price on the till)
Me: “No, that’s £7.99.”
Customer: “Well it says here it’s £2.99.”
Me: “That’s the deep edge canvases.”
(That’s where I got a bit confused. 30x24 staple back canvas - £7.99, 30x24 deep edge canvas - £2.99. Then I read the measurements, the staple backs were priced in inches, and the deep edge in cm.)
Customer: “But look! It says here ’30x24 - £2.99’.”
Me: “Yes, but that’s in cm so it’s for a much smaller canvas. The canvas you want is 30x24 inches.”
Customer: “Well, can I have it for £2.99?”
Me: “No, because even if the sizes had been the same, you were still looking at the prices for the wrong type of canvas.”
(I stand there while he thinks about this.)
Me: “Is everything alright now?”
Customer: “Well no, because I’m a bit disappointed this canvas isn’t £2.99. I’m not trying to be funny or anything, I work in a shop too, y’know. Can you go and speak to your manager and see what he can do?”
What a dickhead! What makes it so much worse is that he also works in a shop. And why mention it? Any empathy I might have had evaporated 10 minutes ago. He wants money off because he was “diappointed” with the price? Big fucking deal.
I go and speak to the manager, wary that he’d given in to a similar customer earlier that day, but I didn’t care what he’d said, that guy was not getting money off that canvas. Luckily the manager thought along exactly the same lines as I did - “That guys just taking the piss!”. So I go down and give this retail slave gone bad the news, which he takes very badly....
Customer: “Well, I want it in writing, please. I want a copy of these prices and I’m going to trading standards on Monday! And can you tell the manager that as well.”
I go and scan both the deep edge and staple back prices and patronise him by asking if he’d like me to highlight the ones in question (“No! I know which ones there are, thankyou!”). I don’t know what he was playing at. Obviously he was desperately trying to get money off this canvas, knowing full well he was in the wrong, and thought he knew all the tricks in the book because he worked in a shop. Must have slipped his mind that I do too. *Sigh*, what a dumbass! I also think he was trying to get a rise out of me by being so difficult so that he could use poor customer service against me as well because he was a bit put out that I was being so nice about everything.
He bought the canvas anyway at £7.99, and we never heard anything from trading standards.
Me: 10092 - Dumbass customers: 0
Why ask me questions if I'm too stupid to understand?
13/07/08 18:17 Filed in: Stories
I’v had 2 people in the last 3 days say I haven’t got a clue what I’m talking about.
A woman on Friday asked me for a paper trimmer. She didn’t know what make it was (another case where those mind reading skills would come in handy), but I managed to find her the right one on the 3rd try. Then as she was walking away she starts talking to me about a sticker holder, but then she says “Oh, I bet you don’t know what any of the stuff is, do you?”. I was going to argue but decided to just say “No, sorry”. She didn’t say it in a horrible manner so I don’t think she was being intentionally insulting, she just didn’t realise what she was saying. I was still a tad annoyed though.
But another old woman came in today asking for “wax paper”. Just to be sure I know what she’s talking about, I asked what it’s used for. I usually do this when I’m not entirely sure because a lot of things in arts & crafts can go by several names, like some people call a putty rubber a “kneadable eraser”, blending stumps go by another name I can’t remember, and get this, a tool that folds paper can also be called a “boning tool”.
So, apparently, wax paper helps protect surfaces when you’re glueing etc. and I know we don’t have anything like that so I tell her we don’t stock it. But as she’s walking away, I hear her tell her husband “I don’t think that girl knows anything!”. Hello! I can still hear you! Later on another member of staff comes up to ask me if we have any wax paper. FFS! I say “I’v already told her - NO!”
It really pisses me off. If you’re not going to believe me or think I’m too stupid to know, then why do you ask me in the first place? You could just use your eyes and look for yourself. Usually it just goes over my head, but I hate being called stupid. If you just don’t believe me, that’s fine, you’re wasting your own time as well as mine, and I can laugh at you later. But don’t fucking say I’m stupid! And even if I’m not Einstein, it doesn’t mean I’m not self-aware. I know when you’re talking about me 2 feet away. I’m not some impervious, apathetic robot and sometimes insults hurt.
A woman on Friday asked me for a paper trimmer. She didn’t know what make it was (another case where those mind reading skills would come in handy), but I managed to find her the right one on the 3rd try. Then as she was walking away she starts talking to me about a sticker holder, but then she says “Oh, I bet you don’t know what any of the stuff is, do you?”. I was going to argue but decided to just say “No, sorry”. She didn’t say it in a horrible manner so I don’t think she was being intentionally insulting, she just didn’t realise what she was saying. I was still a tad annoyed though.
But another old woman came in today asking for “wax paper”. Just to be sure I know what she’s talking about, I asked what it’s used for. I usually do this when I’m not entirely sure because a lot of things in arts & crafts can go by several names, like some people call a putty rubber a “kneadable eraser”, blending stumps go by another name I can’t remember, and get this, a tool that folds paper can also be called a “boning tool”.
So, apparently, wax paper helps protect surfaces when you’re glueing etc. and I know we don’t have anything like that so I tell her we don’t stock it. But as she’s walking away, I hear her tell her husband “I don’t think that girl knows anything!”. Hello! I can still hear you! Later on another member of staff comes up to ask me if we have any wax paper. FFS! I say “I’v already told her - NO!”
It really pisses me off. If you’re not going to believe me or think I’m too stupid to know, then why do you ask me in the first place? You could just use your eyes and look for yourself. Usually it just goes over my head, but I hate being called stupid. If you just don’t believe me, that’s fine, you’re wasting your own time as well as mine, and I can laugh at you later. But don’t fucking say I’m stupid! And even if I’m not Einstein, it doesn’t mean I’m not self-aware. I know when you’re talking about me 2 feet away. I’m not some impervious, apathetic robot and sometimes insults hurt.
Caught red handed...almost
11/07/08 13:33 Filed in: Stories
On Wednesday night I was tidying and I see a boy, about 11, messing with something by the birthday stuff. I’d have thought nothing of it but as soon as he sees me, he runs, full pelt in the opposite direction with something in his hand. I go over to where he was and find an empty Fimo wrapper so I track him down and find him with his mum in DIY. I’v told kids off before, but never in front of their parents, so I thought this woman was going to go ape if I started accusing her son of damaging/stealing stock. I asked him if he had any Fimo on him but he denied it point blank, but looked guilty as hell, so I said “I’m not bothered if you’ve opened it or just found it lying around but I can’t really let you leave the store without paying for it if you’ve still got it”. He turned out his pockets and showed he didn’t have it, but even his mum knew something was up. He must have been in trouble before; she didn’t go ape at me but ordered her son not to leave her side again. Hahaha.
I’ll probably find the Fimo dumped at the back of a shelf somewhere weeks from now, little bastard.
I’ll probably find the Fimo dumped at the back of a shelf somewhere weeks from now, little bastard.
"Staff announcement: Leash for customer in aisle 3!"
04/07/08 11:40 Filed in: Stories
If you ask me to go and get something or find something out for you, stay where you are!
How do you expect me to find you when you wander off to the opposite side of the store?
A woman on Wednesday night asked me if a certain table was in stock so I go and try and find it but can’t, so I have to fetch someone who actually works on Furniture. I go back on the shop floor to let the woman know I’m just going to find someone from that department and she asks me where the napkins are. I tell her Housewares but she says “Oh, so they’re not over there then?”, pointing at textiles. I thought “What?! Not likely!” but then I remembered I had actually seen table runners over there at Christmas so I lead her over to have a look anyway and there were actually some fabric napkins...and placemats....on Textiles. WTF? No wonder no one can ever find anything. It makes no sense whatsoever. And if she knew they were over there, why the hell did she ask me in the first place?!
Anyway, I leave her to look at the napkins and I track someone down to find the table but when I go back to tell her we have the table in stock, she’s neither at the napkins or by the display table! I eventually find her, give her the good news and she isn’t even grateful in the slightest. I’ve just chased around, doing everything her purse desired, then had to search half the store looking for her fat ass and she looks bored as hell, completely oblivious to my efforts, and has to force a thankyou out. I don’t care if it makes you gag, you’ll be grateful and say thankyou!
What also happens quite a lot is when I’m not on my department and a customer needs help, I either get called to customer service or back to A&C. I really wish I didn’t get called back to A&C for a customer because it takes me about 5 minutes to find them. They don’t stay in one place. How can they moan about slow customer service if they make it nearly impossible to find them?! It’s not rocket science!
How do you expect me to find you when you wander off to the opposite side of the store?
A woman on Wednesday night asked me if a certain table was in stock so I go and try and find it but can’t, so I have to fetch someone who actually works on Furniture. I go back on the shop floor to let the woman know I’m just going to find someone from that department and she asks me where the napkins are. I tell her Housewares but she says “Oh, so they’re not over there then?”, pointing at textiles. I thought “What?! Not likely!” but then I remembered I had actually seen table runners over there at Christmas so I lead her over to have a look anyway and there were actually some fabric napkins...and placemats....on Textiles. WTF? No wonder no one can ever find anything. It makes no sense whatsoever. And if she knew they were over there, why the hell did she ask me in the first place?!
Anyway, I leave her to look at the napkins and I track someone down to find the table but when I go back to tell her we have the table in stock, she’s neither at the napkins or by the display table! I eventually find her, give her the good news and she isn’t even grateful in the slightest. I’ve just chased around, doing everything her purse desired, then had to search half the store looking for her fat ass and she looks bored as hell, completely oblivious to my efforts, and has to force a thankyou out. I don’t care if it makes you gag, you’ll be grateful and say thankyou!
What also happens quite a lot is when I’m not on my department and a customer needs help, I either get called to customer service or back to A&C. I really wish I didn’t get called back to A&C for a customer because it takes me about 5 minutes to find them. They don’t stay in one place. How can they moan about slow customer service if they make it nearly impossible to find them?! It’s not rocket science!
Mind Reading
27/06/08 13:41 Filed in: Stories
You know those customers that come in and just expect you to know what they’re looking for?
Me: “Are you okay there?”
Customer: “Erm, yeah, I’m looking for this thing, I saw it in a magazine and it’s blue.”
Me: “Okay, do you have the magazine with you?”
Customer “No, I didn’t think I’d need it.”
And so on.....
I’v even had customers who have come in on someone elses behalf, with no idea about what they’re really looking for, and end up ringing the other person and then hand the phone over to me.
That never, ever works! I will never find whatever it is you’re poorly describing. And no-matter how hard you try, the mental image you’re sending will never reach me.
For example, I had to speak to one woman over the phone who was looking for sequins and I felt like saying “Seriously, do you know how many things with sequins we sell?! Get off your lazy ass and come and look for yourself!”
And another guy came in looking for an easel so I showed him most of the easels we have. Some are on the back wall which you can’t get to unless you get the ladders, which I was willing to do once I’d asked a few questions to find out what type of easel he was after. Then he said “I was looking for something a bit more, y’know, fab”. I just said to him “Easels don’t really get that glamorous”. He decided he’d just have a look round on his own for a while and about 10 minutes later he came back to me with a big red box and said “This was the kind of thing I was looking for”.
Oh, so you wanted a box easel? Why didn’t you just fucking say so?!
Half the time it’s customers expecting you to be a walking encyclopedia. Like, they can’t even be bothered to remember the name of what they’re looking for. Just the freakin’ name! So they expect you to know every single product and to do their thinking for them.
And the other half are customers who don’t really know what they’re looking for. They haven’t done their research and just come in with a vague description.
I was just reading a few stories on Facebook about these mind reading skills some customers think we possess. Say, a customer orders a coffee but doesn’t specify what kind then kicks off when it isn’t decaf. Is telepathy more common than I thought? We work in a shop which obviously means we’re all as thick as pig shit but we’re supposed to be able to read minds?
This must be about #127on my list of “Things I don’t get” about retail. I wish #1 was customers, but alas, I get lots of them.
Me: “Are you okay there?”
Customer: “Erm, yeah, I’m looking for this thing, I saw it in a magazine and it’s blue.”
Me: “Okay, do you have the magazine with you?”
Customer “No, I didn’t think I’d need it.”
And so on.....
I’v even had customers who have come in on someone elses behalf, with no idea about what they’re really looking for, and end up ringing the other person and then hand the phone over to me.
That never, ever works! I will never find whatever it is you’re poorly describing. And no-matter how hard you try, the mental image you’re sending will never reach me.
For example, I had to speak to one woman over the phone who was looking for sequins and I felt like saying “Seriously, do you know how many things with sequins we sell?! Get off your lazy ass and come and look for yourself!”
And another guy came in looking for an easel so I showed him most of the easels we have. Some are on the back wall which you can’t get to unless you get the ladders, which I was willing to do once I’d asked a few questions to find out what type of easel he was after. Then he said “I was looking for something a bit more, y’know, fab”. I just said to him “Easels don’t really get that glamorous”. He decided he’d just have a look round on his own for a while and about 10 minutes later he came back to me with a big red box and said “This was the kind of thing I was looking for”.
Oh, so you wanted a box easel? Why didn’t you just fucking say so?!
Half the time it’s customers expecting you to be a walking encyclopedia. Like, they can’t even be bothered to remember the name of what they’re looking for. Just the freakin’ name! So they expect you to know every single product and to do their thinking for them.
And the other half are customers who don’t really know what they’re looking for. They haven’t done their research and just come in with a vague description.
I was just reading a few stories on Facebook about these mind reading skills some customers think we possess. Say, a customer orders a coffee but doesn’t specify what kind then kicks off when it isn’t decaf. Is telepathy more common than I thought? We work in a shop which obviously means we’re all as thick as pig shit but we’re supposed to be able to read minds?
This must be about #127on my list of “Things I don’t get” about retail. I wish #1 was customers, but alas, I get lots of them.
I Solemnly Swear...
04/06/08 00:33 Filed in: Stories
…to tell the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth. And you, stupid, conceited little customer better believe me or so help your sorry fucking ass!
Why is it that some customers just don’t believe a word you say? Like if they don’t like your answer, they go off to find someone that will tell them what they want to hear. One snobby old woman was so persistent I wish she’d pop her hip out or something. Alas, then she wouldn’t have been able to walk out the store.
Conversation goes something like so:
Woman: “Excuse me, do you have any place cards”? (i.e. seating cards for weddings etc.)
Me: “No, sorry, we don’t.”
Woman: “Is there anyone else who might know?”
Me: “No, I work on that department and I know we don’t have them.”
Woman: “Oh, I’l go and ask at customer services then. Maybe they’ll know.”
Me: “No, seriously! If you go and ask at customer services, they’re only going to call me on the tannoy and I’l have to walk all the way over there to tell you we don’t have them. We don’t sell place cards!”
And after all that, she still went over and asked at customer services and I had to walk all the way over there just to say “No!”. Then she left, albeit not in a wheelchair.
Why is it that some customers just don’t believe a word you say? Like if they don’t like your answer, they go off to find someone that will tell them what they want to hear. One snobby old woman was so persistent I wish she’d pop her hip out or something. Alas, then she wouldn’t have been able to walk out the store.
Conversation goes something like so:
Woman: “Excuse me, do you have any place cards”? (i.e. seating cards for weddings etc.)
Me: “No, sorry, we don’t.”
Woman: “Is there anyone else who might know?”
Me: “No, I work on that department and I know we don’t have them.”
Woman: “Oh, I’l go and ask at customer services then. Maybe they’ll know.”
Me: “No, seriously! If you go and ask at customer services, they’re only going to call me on the tannoy and I’l have to walk all the way over there to tell you we don’t have them. We don’t sell place cards!”
And after all that, she still went over and asked at customer services and I had to walk all the way over there just to say “No!”. Then she left, albeit not in a wheelchair.
Mission #1
04/06/08 00:31 Filed in: Evidence!
Like Alice once said: “What is the use of a book without pictures?”; so what is the use of a blog complaining about customers without a little evidence to back it up. Last night while I was working a late and there were no customers about, I took a video of a lovely mess of tangled ribbon that customers had left me, along with a few surprises*. Unfortunately, I can only use my phone camera so sincerest apologies for the quality but you get the idea.
So from now on, whenever possible, I’l try and get pictures (at least) to shame those pesky customers who think it’s okay to break, smash, dump and mess things up in my department!
*Confetti, paintbrush, acrylic paint, “English Countryside” stamp.
The white discs and clear plastic round things are what remains of the ribbon spools.
So from now on, whenever possible, I’l try and get pictures (at least) to shame those pesky customers who think it’s okay to break, smash, dump and mess things up in my department!
*Confetti, paintbrush, acrylic paint, “English Countryside” stamp.
The white discs and clear plastic round things are what remains of the ribbon spools.
Tidyness Theory
04/06/08 00:30 Filed in: Rants
I’v noticed that the tidier the shelves are in the first place, the longer they stay tidy for. Sounds obvious but I only realised after I tidied an isle to perfection and when I came back at the end of the day there wasn’t much I needed to do, the customers had actually kept it in pretty good order. I think it’s because it’s more noticeable if they put something back out of place, whereas if an isle is already a bit messed up then they’ll put stuff back any old way because the item next to it is a bit skewif anyway. Then by the end of the day it’s just completely out of control. That’s my theory anyway.
What really annoys me is when people dump stuff in the wrong place right in front of me! I might work in a shop which automatically means people think I have an IQ of 2, but I’m not blind as well. Even when I’m trying to help them and they don’t like what I show them, they’ll just throw it down again in completely the wrong place.
But what I hate most of all is people opening packaging, especially if it involves ripping, tearing and damaging beyond repair. Today I found 2 of the same item with their boxes ripped apart. 2! As if they didn’t believe what was in the first box and it was some kind of lucky dip. Then if they decide they want to buy one, they don’t want the one they’ve just opened so take another one. Possibly the worst case I’v found though was a printer ink refill kit that had been opened and the ink had spilt onto other stock. It ended up all over my hands and wouldn’t come off so I looked like I had some weird skin disease for 2 days. And I know who did it- some wretched kid who I’d seen hanging about earlier. I wish I’d caught him. It’s great telling kids off without their parents around, they poo themselves.
By the sounds of it, our store is one of the worst in the chain for people messing things up and destroying stuff. Just the kind of people our town attracts are like the bottom of the barrel, the scum of the surrounding towns. Dolites with no teeth and 8 kids, eugh!
What really annoys me is when people dump stuff in the wrong place right in front of me! I might work in a shop which automatically means people think I have an IQ of 2, but I’m not blind as well. Even when I’m trying to help them and they don’t like what I show them, they’ll just throw it down again in completely the wrong place.
But what I hate most of all is people opening packaging, especially if it involves ripping, tearing and damaging beyond repair. Today I found 2 of the same item with their boxes ripped apart. 2! As if they didn’t believe what was in the first box and it was some kind of lucky dip. Then if they decide they want to buy one, they don’t want the one they’ve just opened so take another one. Possibly the worst case I’v found though was a printer ink refill kit that had been opened and the ink had spilt onto other stock. It ended up all over my hands and wouldn’t come off so I looked like I had some weird skin disease for 2 days. And I know who did it- some wretched kid who I’d seen hanging about earlier. I wish I’d caught him. It’s great telling kids off without their parents around, they poo themselves.
By the sounds of it, our store is one of the worst in the chain for people messing things up and destroying stuff. Just the kind of people our town attracts are like the bottom of the barrel, the scum of the surrounding towns. Dolites with no teeth and 8 kids, eugh!
Non-scanning
03/06/08 22:45 Filed in: Stories
A dozen times a day I get an item that isn’t recognised on the till. I can try looking it up on the till but I usually try asking if the customer knows what the description was with the price which would make it a lot easier to find. But nearly all the customers have no idea, like they have a one-track mind, they just see numbers. I asked a woman today if she knew the description for an item she’d brought and all she said was “They’re over there. £2.99. They’re all £2.99.” Did I ask you the fucking price? I need the description to find the price! Then she went over to grab another of the same item, like that barcode was more likely to scan. Yeah, dead helpful.
There’s also the customers who bring items with no barcodes on. Sometimes they say “Oh, trust me to pick the dodgy one up”, but a lot of customers just stand there glaring impatiently. That’s when I feel like saying “How the hell did you expect me to scan it?”.
And then the last category of customers come out with “If it doesn’t scan it means it’s free” and think they’re really funny. Who hasn’t heard that one? *sigh*.
There’s also the customers who bring items with no barcodes on. Sometimes they say “Oh, trust me to pick the dodgy one up”, but a lot of customers just stand there glaring impatiently. That’s when I feel like saying “How the hell did you expect me to scan it?”.
And then the last category of customers come out with “If it doesn’t scan it means it’s free” and think they’re really funny. Who hasn’t heard that one? *sigh*.
